When I imagine a God, I imagine a God that is fully aware and enveloped by knowledge; a God that is not frightened about the future. No idea, no man, no opposition startles God, he simply knows all. I think of God as a fierce being that is in charge of everything but has the utmost humility to debate and discuss — without minimizing his control over every situation.
God is not a king on a throne, he is the prince in the trenches, fighting our fight for us, while we cower in the background. The Bible illustrates this beautifully in the story of David facing Goliath. Many say that this story is meant to motivate us in our fight against sin. They say, “You should slay the giant just like David slayed Goliath on that day.” But this is a slight misunderstanding of the story, I think. Jesus is David in the story. We are the people of Israel cowering, while Jesus kills the giant which is sin in our lives.
In my own life I overruled this empty throne. I realized it was empty and I thought myself cunning to quickly take over. What I did not realize was that God never sat on it.
What God did to me was that he opened my eyes to see that from the beginning I was on that throne and I will continuously be on it, to the day that I die. God helped me see that I was the one sitting on this throne. And I would rule on it for the rest of my life.
God is not this dominant figure that rules apart from us. He rules humbly beside us and shakes our Kingdom. He is in control but we remain on this throne. We will receive council.
This council is not something that need to ask for, in the end. It is something that will be given to each and every one of us in different and unique ways. That is how beautiful it is.
Each time I come to Slovakia, to visit. I appreciate it differently. That is how God feels when he comes to our land. He appreciates it differently. Now I do not consider God as greater than me. He is not. He is equal, but in his equality he is much more vast than I am.
He creates himself to be equal for me. He wants me to see the finish line. And he runs to me as I come back to him. And that is not a happy ending. That is something that I wish I had never discovered.
I want him to be untrue. I want happiness to be found in my being, but it can not. And that is where I am happy. In a kingdom of my own visited by the King with sweet visits and consolations. He lets me think that it is my decision to receive his council, when in reality he is the one that shakes me and lets me stand in the end.
What a beautiful fantasy to live in.