When was the last time you sat down only with yourself, not looking forward to meeting someone to satisfy your craving for company, and not distracted by your Instagram Discovery feed?
It is in that moment of undistracted isolation that you are dependant upon the states of mind that arise in consciousness.
If you feel happy, you are happy. If you feel sad, you are sad. If you feel anxious, you are anxious.
When alone, instead of trying to change the state of mind by grabbing the closest smartphone and/or putting on a Netflix show, observe what this feeling is and why it arose. You will quickly discover that most feelings arise due to expectations your own mind generates.
Let me provide an example. When in company, we think we know what it’s like to be the person that is talking to us and we imagine what she/ he is thinking when they see us.
These self-judgements, however, are clearly never accurate. These thoughts are not a valid assessment of your conversation. When alone, ask yourself, is my mind making valid assessments of my situation?
Next time you’re stricken with loneliness, don’t seek to quench your thirst for distraction. Instead, understand your predicament truly as it always is — you are alone — but being truly present even for these moments is necessary for being fully present in company.
Before you go…
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I write to keep you thinking and to keep me thankful and reflective. Cheers and until next time,